I've decided to call in sick again today. I know that now my body needs some rest and a chance to get over this bug so I have a fighting chance.
While I was off, my parents popped over to cut the bits of the lawn that the robot mower doesn't go to at the front of the house. They also strimmed some of the banks in the garden to neaten the place up.
The builders are still cracking on with the garage. It is starting to take shape a little and you can picture now what it might look like.
Mostly though, I have been watching Netflix and have been carrying on with Reign, well into the last season now and also I've found Friends on there.
It is funny, how 20-30 years after Friends was recorded that it now seems a little stereotypical, sexist, and a few others -ists thrown in there too. It was so relevant and funny in the day. It is definitely of its time. But I'm also aware that the characters mature and develop so much come the final season. They are on a journey from breaking away from their parents, finding jobs, living in their own places, finding love and finding their feet in life.
Chandler, in particular, seems to change the most. He goes from being the complete joker douchebag to a much more gentle, genuine and tender guy some the end of Friends. This is how life is. You go through experiences and they change you.
I also wanted to do a little craft and so carried on with the Christmas cross-stitch I started over the weekend.
Walter always manages to find the smallest patch of sun and sits in it! He is a real sun worshiper!
It was a really beautiful start to the day.
But it went downhill very quickly when I discovered my Mummy to be mug is broken. 😞
Today, it is Caz's sister's birthday. Unfortunately, we won't get to see her as I am a bit too poorly and she is back in Chester for her final year of university. We bought her a 'worlds greatest Auntie' apron. She was chuffed with it! I understand that she also got a cake mixer so it continues that theme for her!
I decided to start making some pompoms today when I had finished off the Christmas cross-stitch. I do have a plan to make a smallish rug for our baby's room. It will mostly be the colours we have throughout the house - greys and teals. But I think there is a bit of pink thrown in too and possibly a bit of orange!
I only managed 4 in the end. They started really well, but then started to look quite ratty come the fifth one. So I've put them to one side for now. As and when I have 5 minutes I will just knock another one up and throw it in the box. I imagine I will need 50-odd to make the rug. So a few more to make yet...!
Walter always looks after me when I'm poorly. He sits on me and seems to keep an eye on me. Perhaps it is just a warm and comfortable place but I like to think he loves me!
We were due to go to the second and final antenatal class today. But we don't think I should be around pregnant women with my cough and cold. I don't want to infect Mum's before their due dates - that wouldn't be fair.
So we have missed out on finding out how to care for the baby. I think they were due to cover nappies, feeding and bathing. I'm sure we'll work it out! Isn't it all winging it anyway?!
26th September
Today, I have my next round of checkups.
I don't hold out much hope for my kidney function. Usually, after I've been fighting off a bug my kidney goes into overdrive and goes downhill. It often picks back up again after a little while, but around the time it might be a bit poor.
First stop - blood test. That was in and out pretty quickly with no issues.
Next, we went to McDonald's as usual to have a hot drink. I chose a latte and a blueberry muffin. I couldn't eat the muffin straight away with having taken my immunosuppressants medications - they need to be taken on an empty stomach.
We then popped to Tesco to kill a bit of time and as we needed to pick up some more cat food for Walter.
We saw a different obstetrician today. I think she was called Dr Vachanni. She was to the point and quite down to earth. Told me to avoid crowded places, so I plan to go back to work tomorrow! I always take the advice to heart... It is only 7 more working days.
One thing she said though is that I could expect to need a stay in ITU - intensive therapy unit. I hadn't appreciated that I might be bad enough after delivery to need intensive care.
BUT looking back, I didn't need HDU (high dependency unit) after my transplant despite them saying I would need it, but I did also have a private room so could be isolated and looked after a bit easier. I did need monitoring every hour or two hours. I felt hot and cold. I needed a blood transfusion. But I came through.
My Mum didn't think I would make it. She said she expected a phone call during the night to say I'd gone. But I never considered that myself. I just thought I've been through a lot, it will just take a little while to get there. I never thought, oh I could die. I didn't feel scared at all.
I will go in expecting the worst case scenario and feel pleased when I walk out of there a few hours after giving birth!
I just need to get over this cold, eat healthily and be active and positive and then I will have the best chance possible.
We then popped over to the renal department to catch up with Dr Alejmi and Rebecca.
Dr Alejmi always jokes that I always say 'I'm fine' and that the answer is now 'no'. It is just that things can be so much worse and so I don't like to complain.
He took pity on me and started me on antibiotics for my cough. Hopefully, then I will start to feel better in a few days.
Surprisingly, everything else was fine! My Hb is still around 100 so good for me and my creatinine was 120 so that is really on the nose for a good result with me! I'm really happy!
They did say though, that my sodium is a bit low and so they have put me back on sodium bicarbonate - one morning and night.
I am feeling a fair bit brighter today. So, definitely back to work tomorrow especially now I'm on antibiotics and should feel even better in a few days.
The garage is looking really good. Caz picked out the colours perfectly! They really match the house so well. It is a steel frame building with steel corrugated sheets for the walls that are plasti-coated. The main structure is a warm cream which goes with the house's aran k-rend perfectly. The flashings, guttering, windows and doors are all an exact colour match with the anthracite grey everything else with our house is. He picked out the actual RAL colour code so it will be identical colours.
So the sides and roof are on so just the finishing to go now.
It looks big! I bet he is really pleased with it. A proper man-cave!
27th September
Well, today I'm going back to work.
As I left for work, this is the current report of progress on the garage. It should be completed tomorrow!
Once I've had breakfast I will have a full 3 doses of amoxicillin in me and so it should hopefully start having an effect.
I have already been told I am a bit thick...! I'm obviously not back to full health, but I'm feeling better in myself and all my ribs don't hurt from coughing now. It is more a tickle.
But I am so so tired. I am debating about going for a walk at lunch or a nap... I think it might be more of a coin toss at the time as to what I actually end up doing!
In a way, I feel like my cough is clearing up a little. Well, it has definitely 'dried up'. It isn't like I'm rattling as much and not hacking away.
I went for a walk in the end. I managed to walk a mile in total. My lungs hurt but I wanted to try and get them working more to their capacity rather than coughing and shallow breathing all the time. I don't know if this might worsen me or improve how I'm feeling. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time.
It was also surprisingly warm at the time - in the low twenties!
I am literally counting down the days now. Just another 6 working days once this day is over.
In the evening I was too tired to even decide what to watch on TV and so Caz picked a show with Rob Bell, our favourite engineer presenter!
This programme was about the Mary Rose. This was the ship owned by Henry the VIII. It was sunk in the Solent.
The show investigated how the sinking came about when it is meant to be such a stable ship and it went through some of the recovery dives to collect the remnants of the vessel and items from the ship.
Quite interesting or at least Rob Bell makes it interesting with his enthusiasm!
28th September
A few of my joints feel achy again today. I'm still fairly tired and this cough is lingering on.
I had a sleep on my lunch break and I only have 5 working days left!
The garage is finished!
The builders are going to try and see their mate who is still in hospital after his emergency trip there a week ago. Then onwards to home in Newcastle-upon-Tyne.
It is quite dark now so I can't quite see the garage. I'll have to look at it in the morning!
I decided, for the first time in a while, to paint my nails!
I just went for a pearlescent pink colour. It has been an age since I last 'pampered' myself. I am debating about getting Shellac nails and maybe toes before I go in to deliver my baby girl. I just want to feel as 'nice' as can be. I know I will be a sweaty, tired but happy mess afterwards but I want to do something for me as a last hurrah before everything as about my mini-me!
29th September
When I woke up, I went to let Walter out of the utility and he swiftly ran back upstairs with me and settled down really quickly to snuggles!
Today, it is my parent's wedding anniversary. It is 33 years I think but I have kind of lost count now! It might actually be 34 years... I am 33 this year so they would have waited to have me with being Christian. So it must be 34 years!
I bought them a bunch of flowers and made a card for them.
I had debated about buying a plain glass vase and then using my stained glass paints to do a design on it but I've just not been up to it lately, unfortunately.
We popped over with the flowers and card and they offered us tea and chocolate swiss roll. They didn't have much planned for today - just the usual dog walk!
But we had a good chat and caught up with various news and that.
We did encounter a little difficulty at one point. My Mum keeps pronouncing my baby's name incorrectly. Jesse. It isn't difficult. It isn't Jess. It is Jesse. It was like a punch to the stomach when she said it. I described it to Caz as if I had a volcano within me that was imminently about to erupt. I instantly corrected my Mum. When she said Jess again a few minutes later I louder said 'It is Jesse'.
I know my Mum wants to acknowledge Jesse, but in a way, if you are going to say their name wrong then I'd rather she just forgot Jesse even happened. It would be gentler on my heart that way.
We then went over to Caz's family to have dinner.
His Mum, Step-Dad, sister and Nain we all there so it was nice to see them. We had some good catching up and Elaine, Caz's Mum, gave us some craft projects she had been working on for our baby - a bag to hang in the wardrobe with bunny and balloons on the print, two little drawstring bags with a ballet dancer printed on them which could be ideal as PE bags or for some after-school classes for the future perhaps and a teeny tiny knitted cardigan.
We had been told from the beginning of our pregnancy that our baby would be small and early. The obstetrician predicted a birth in September. This month finishes tomorrow so I don't think that is going to happen now!
So we have gone from expecting a very premature baby to knocking on the door of full term! We've done so well and baby girl is growing perfectly - right on target.
I look forward to proving the doctors very wrong indeed!
30th September
As per most weekends lately, this one is a relaxed and quiet one.
We finished watching the F1 qualifying during breakfast.
I then washed my hair, put a load of bedding on to wash and then settled down to do some crafting.
I made 2 new jewellery crafts.
One was an autumnal bunch of twigs pendant:
The other is an autumnal coloured spider pendant. Caz thought the spider looked creepy but I like him. It's mostly legs, obviously!
I also saw a simple craft project in a magazine to make gift tags or placenames. So using washi tape and a craft knife I decorated some tiny wooden pegs. They look really quite effective.
When I bought this glittery tape I also bought some animal print ones. I am thinking of using the animal print washi tape to decorate 9 or 12 pegs to make a photo collage in our Baby's room. I'm thinking of putting a progress photo for each month we progressed through and a baby scan photo on each row. I want to attach the photos using the pegs to some twine that is suspended between two branches that I'll saw from one of our trees in the garden!
I've also started a second Christmas cross-stitch! This one is a little more simple - no lazy daisy stitches and no fractional stitches! It is just a holly wreath with a message around the edge in a straight stitch and backstitch to outline everything.
Here's what the first Christmas cross-stitch ended up looking like:
I think it will look nice to have this cross-stitch and the other one in small embroidery hoops and popped on the wall during the festivities. They can always replace another frame or photo from the wall during that season.
Doing the cross stitch also got me thinking why didn't I create a baby arrival one for my Jesse? It could be a good excuse to try my hand at some embroidery as that looks so effective and professional.
I could have bunting at the top of the hoop and also feature butterflies and stars. In the centre would be "Jesse Massey" and the date they came into our lives.
I can then, when I have the energy, create one for this baby once they are here. I'd use a similar design but perhaps a unicorn and mermaid on instead of the butterfly and stars. Or perhaps a cat? I imagine baby girl and Walter might be best buddies - often found snuggling up to one another. He is the sweetest cat. I hope he lives up to our expectations with our baby. Obviously, we'll always supervise and never leave him alone with her, always making sure we know where he is and that he isn't trying to sit on her head/face like he does to us when we are lying in bed!
We then watched the F1 race from Russia. Verstappen came all the way from the back to come really far up the grid come the end. There were a few manoeuvres that made me shout out a bit! One was when Vettel moved under braking. That was a bit of a heart in the mouth moment.
Later in the evening, we started watching 999: The Front Line. It seemed to follow a few different services but mostly focussed on the ambulance service in the parts we watched.
I remember seeing a clip online from one of the episodes where there was a call about a child who had stopped breathing and had suspected cardiac arrest. That is like the highest of all priorities and most critical of calls you can receive. The crew raced to the address but the occupants said they hadn't called an ambulance. The police then got involved and escorted the ambulance to a similar address nearby. Again, nothing. The call was traced to a mobile from a supermarket. No one was found there and then the phone was found to be switched off. It was a prank call.
The ambulance crew looked drained and devastated. You build up this adrenaline to enable you to respond to an emergency but then have nowhere for it to release. The driver buried his head in his hands and looked really emotional. Why would people waste these guys' time? They could be dealing with actual emergencies and not going on wild goose chases. It was really shocking.
October is baby loss awareness month, with the 9th to 15th of the month being baby loss awareness week. On the 15th there will be a wave of light to remember all the lost babies. At 7pm, local time, you light a candle for at least an hour to show that these babies mattered and aren't forgotten.
So I will be posting along that theme a lot more for the next 31 days.
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